Expanding Universe: Superman and Friends

Sunday, June 26 2011
Woke up this morning and waded across the hotel room to take a shower. Decided to wake everyone else up with Erasure's "A Little Respect" and was treated with a 98% nude dance from the banana-hammocked Gabe.

Not pictured: Gabe

 No show today so we took our sweet time traveling between St. Louis and Knoxville on the way to Wilmington for a show on Monday night. That meant some casual dining at Taco Bell, some upscale shopping at Wal-Mart, and of course, a stop at one of America's most revered landmarks. Yeah, you know what I'm talkin' about...

The world famous Giant Superman Statue in Metropolis, Illinois. Metropolis is a wonderland of Superman merchandise, Superman-branded Pepsi machines, poorly painted Supermen on every building, and, most importantly, Superman Thomas.

The road beyond Metropolis was, understandably, not as exciting as the Superman-filled wonderland we left behind. But there was still one very important discovery for us to make at a gas station in Tennessee: a stockpile of time-warped WWF t-shirts from the year 2000. All the classics were there, Stone Cold, Lita, Latino Heat, Kurt Angle, Tazz, and this now-classic number, which has already been incorporated into James' wardrobe:

That dude is addicted to Jerichohol

It is currently 5am local time and we are all wide awake, listening to Sadistik Exekution's "Dejeka Infinitus" while Gabe finishes the day the way he started it: terrorizing people with his tightly-wrapped ballsack.